TL;DR:

  • a couple of months of getting to know a woman who initiated contact first, who’s shown signals of interest but also tends to withdraw a lot, would like opinions of others to gauge interest potential 🙏

So I’ve been getting to know a woman (32 F, I’m M 40) over the last couple of months. She randomly followed me on IG one day, she was childhood friends with one of my PT clients so she’ll have seen my account on her stories.

  • ⁠at first I thought she was just wanting to get into the gym, because that’s what she first messaged me about and she’s into hiking and that sort of stuff. But we started talking more and more on a regular basis, and the gym has never come up again so I think it was just an excuse to start talking to me. From the people I’ve spoken to that know her, everyone has told me she’s incredibly genuine and lovely but also VERY introverted and shy.

  • she told me really early on that she’s got a terrible reputation with her friends for being impossible to get hold of over the phone, messages etc. She said she’ll sit there and know she’s got messages to reply to, but she won’t or gets frustrated by herself that she leaves them unopened but can’t understand why she doesn’t just reply.

  • there’s signs that she’s interested. She’s super enthusiastic about me sending her voice notes, she’ll like my stories where I’m training in them, she’ll send 🥰🥰 back if I compliment her, she’ll send me reels that she’ll think I like, she added me to Facebook when she took her IG down for a bit so we could still talk, she started sending me video messages the other week when she was out hiking, she’s started sending voice notes etc.

  • but she’s super down on herself a lot of the time. She’s always calling herself negative stuff, she’ll put herself down a lot. The other day I laughed at something she said in a video message and she replied with “this is why you can never meet me, I’m such a social fuck up 😭😭😭😂”.
    So I think us meeting up has definitely been on her mind (she brought it up, not me) but I think she’s very anxious that if I meet her I’ll think less of her or I’ll think she’s weird or awkward.

  • she has a tendency to withdraw. Not ghost me, she never does that. And it’s not just with me, it’s with everyone. But the last week or so, there’s been more of a change. Beforehand she’d withdraw and I wouldn’t hear anything for a few days, whereas now if she withdraws she’ll like IG stories or laugh at stuff I post or whatever, so even if we don’t message we’ll still engage in some way.

I’d like to hear people’s opinions on this, and their take on if they think she’s interested or not? I consider myself an understand and patient person, is this something with potential to stick with?


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