I've read similar posts on this sub, but nothing exactly the same so I want to ask about how to end a long term friendship that you've never really enjoyed.
Basically I have several friends in my life who I've been friends with for years that I don't enjoy spending time with and with whom I feel uncomfortable spending time. It's not that I've lost interest over time, but rather that I'm really bad at saying 'no.' I've just said yes to hanging out over many years to the point that now we have a years-long friendship even though I never really enjoyed their company. With some people it's gotten to the point that they consider me a very close friend even though I don't feel understood by them.
To give one example, I have a friend I've known for about 5 years who I've never really felt a connection with or enjoyed spending time with. She constantly invites me to do things together and I don't want to hang out, but I can tell she gets mad when I reject her invitations enough so eventually I agree to hang out. I've tried not initiating messaging or hanging out but she will still write me about once a week to hangout. I've heard her complain about other people in her life who "never initiate contact" and she seems angry and hurt by it. I'm very bad with confrontation and I don't want people to be hurt or mad at me, so I find myself agreeing to hang out with her even when I really don't want to.
So my question is, how do you tell a friend who sees you as a very close friend that you don't really feel a connection with them and that you have never really enjoyed spending time together? That seems too harsh to say. Is there a way to end the friendship more tactfully than just coming out and saying that? I want to be honest but also don't want to hurt them.