If you had a son, what would be the first thing you’ll teach him?
August 28, 2025
Or if you already have one, what’s the first thing you taught him?
45 comments
How to clean up after themselves ha
I guess technically, how to drink from a nipple (mine or the bottle’s)? Or how to latch on? Or like…that when he cries, someone is going to try to address his needs and/or make him feel better.
If you’re asking about the bigger life themes, maybe empathy. Other people exist and have inner worlds, thoughts, and feelings that are just as complicated and Big as the one you have. I realize that babies/toddlers/kids take some time to grasp that concept, but it’s important to me.
My son is 1. The first thing I have taught him is that I’m his safe space. The first thing I think he has learned from me is that he can do anything and I will be there to support him.
These were the same for my daughter looking back!
On a serious note? That crying or showing any sort of emotion isn’t weak if he needs to express himself or let something out to and let it out in a healthy manner to go for it ….i grew up seeing so many people I love destroy themselves because they expressed themselves or cried because in my culture man aren’t supposed to feel which is stupid
[removed]
Values
Consent and showering properly
That it’s ok to cry and be vulnerable.
How to pee in the toilet without missing or at least how to clean up if they do
Not even sure tbh just be a kind and respectful human but teen years… reinforce boundaries
I have a son and the first thing I taught him is how much I love him.
His birthday was a bit rough for me. We had to do an emergency c-section. His head was wedged in the birth canal and the table was rocking as they had to really pull him out. When I tell him the story I say he was really holding on and when he finally came out he took my heart with him. That way he knows I can’t live without him.
not to be a red pill guy, you’d be shocked how many there are living among us acting regular
That just because his dad didn’t act like a man, doesn’t mean he has to follow suit.
me: ma-ma
[removed]
The first year you teach them to walk. The next year, you teach them to talk. Then, for the rest of their lives, you try to get them to sit down and shut up.
i have one. hes 30. but potty was one of the 1st.
eating with actually putting food in his mouth. vs his hair.
Compassion, vulnerability, and that home is a *safe* space.
The same as i would teach my daughter.
The normal stuff, like “how to crawl, how to walk, how to speak…
I see no difference in teaching a boy or a girl something. Both will gain a skill
Don’t bite.
Be kind and share.
Have empathy for and patience with others.
Pick up after yourself.
Learn to cook, wash clothes and clean the bathroom for yourself.
Say mama! 😁
Emotional expression and self-regulation
Not an ‘if’ for me. My son is now 14. One of the first things I taught him was how to recognise frustration specifically and how to deal with it before it turns into anger. We also normalised crying as a valid and having an important physical role in making us feel better (releasing endorphins etc). Linking our physical responses to our emotional ones was a very early part of my parenting journey for him and me. Emotional intelligence was super important for me to pass on to him because his father has none.
Then my daughter was born when he was 3yo so I began teaching how to read non verbal cues regarding consent.
So those two things were very early lessons for my son.
To hold a bottle or to talk?
How to latch on
I’m GenX, my daughter a Millennial and my grandson is GenZ. I was very involved with raising him and I told him many times, you will learn how to take care of yourself. Cooking, laundry, cleaning, pet responsibilities, financial planning, communication, social manners, empathy, compassion, self care, etiquette because no woman was put on this planet to serve you. He had his first dog walking business at 10, he’s a hustler and knows how to make and save money. He turns 19 next month, moved to another State to officially start his LLC with his business partner, engaged to a wonderful woman and had a very bright future ahead of him.
His Mom did an amazing job. She didn’t coddle him or give him passes. He learned to take responsibility for his actions. She limited phone/screen time, he had boundaries and when he broke them, he found out. She didn’t play.
She wasn’t going to raise a child who was entitled. She raised someone who will make a great husband/Dad/Son in Law and overall, an amazing human. And he will be and already is a wonderful human to be around. I am excited for him and his future.
be kind. generally. not specifically just to women, but to everyone. you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar!
How to not be a bigot -from my fiancé and I 😹
Um…to eat solid food?
My son is 17 now. We were big into manners, and at his current age, he’s such a polite, sweet young man ❤️
Hygiene !!
To sleep independently. Mine is 2.5 month old. I have a Velcro baby…
I have one, he’s our first, and he’s only 14 months, but I’m teaching him kindness first. To us, our dogs, people, himself.
Use the toilet and wipe
That he’s a human being who matters.
How to pee sitting down and then when he’s tall enough to aim his stream into the toilet.
How to say “mama”
Emotional regulation, how to clean up, personal hygiene, manners
My almost 8yo likes cooking, meditation, and how to wash his own buttcrack. Anything else in life is bonus lol
Emotional intelligence.
Confidence
Saying: “that’s how I’m wired” isn’t an excuse for not communicating important issues… whether it be with family, friends, romantic relationships, etc.
Nor is it an excuse to justify one’s bad behaviour, which can have a devastating impact.
Please and thank you and love. And knowing that he was safe
I have one the first thing i taught him how to do is hold his head up
I do have a son and he’s currently a toddler. The first thing we really taught him (beyond human basics) ended up being about hitting. We got books and watched videos and had conversations about how your hands are not for hitting.
He took the lesson super well and now we’re teaching him about consent. Mostly because if Dad hugs Mom, our son tries to put Dad in time out. So now we tell him, “No, Mom WANTS a hug from Dad so it’s okay. But if Mom did not want a hug from Dad, then Dad shouldn’t hug Mom and should be okay with that.”
It’s a slower lesson for him to grasp, but he is starting to get it.
I think the first thing I taught him was probably how to say “mama”, or maybe don’t pull the cat’s tail
45 comments
How to clean up after themselves ha
I guess technically, how to drink from a nipple (mine or the bottle’s)? Or how to latch on? Or like…that when he cries, someone is going to try to address his needs and/or make him feel better.
If you’re asking about the bigger life themes, maybe empathy. Other people exist and have inner worlds, thoughts, and feelings that are just as complicated and Big as the one you have. I realize that babies/toddlers/kids take some time to grasp that concept, but it’s important to me.
My son is 1. The first thing I have taught him is that I’m his safe space. The first thing I think he has learned from me is that he can do anything and I will be there to support him.
These were the same for my daughter looking back!
On a serious note? That crying or showing any sort of emotion isn’t weak if he needs to express himself or let something out to and let it out in a healthy manner to go for it ….i grew up seeing so many people I love destroy themselves because they expressed themselves or cried because in my culture man aren’t supposed to feel which is stupid
[removed]
Values
Consent and showering properly
That it’s ok to cry and be vulnerable.
How to pee in the toilet without missing or at least how to clean up if they do
Not even sure tbh just be a kind and respectful human but teen years… reinforce boundaries
I have a son and the first thing I taught him is how much I love him.
His birthday was a bit rough for me. We had to do an emergency c-section. His head was wedged in the birth canal and the table was rocking as they had to really pull him out. When I tell him the story I say he was really holding on and when he finally came out he took my heart with him. That way he knows I can’t live without him.
not to be a red pill guy, you’d be shocked how many there are living among us acting regular
That just because his dad didn’t act like a man, doesn’t mean he has to follow suit.
me: ma-ma
[removed]
The first year you teach them to walk. The next year, you teach them to talk. Then, for the rest of their lives, you try to get them to sit down and shut up.
i have one. hes 30. but potty was one of the 1st.
eating with actually putting food in his mouth. vs his hair.
Compassion, vulnerability, and that home is a *safe* space.
The same as i would teach my daughter.
The normal stuff, like “how to crawl, how to walk, how to speak…
I see no difference in teaching a boy or a girl something. Both will gain a skill
Don’t bite.
Be kind and share.
Have empathy for and patience with others.
Pick up after yourself.
Learn to cook, wash clothes and clean the bathroom for yourself.
Say mama! 😁
Emotional expression and self-regulation
Not an ‘if’ for me. My son is now 14. One of the first things I taught him was how to recognise frustration specifically and how to deal with it before it turns into anger. We also normalised crying as a valid and having an important physical role in making us feel better (releasing endorphins etc). Linking our physical responses to our emotional ones was a very early part of my parenting journey for him and me. Emotional intelligence was super important for me to pass on to him because his father has none.
Then my daughter was born when he was 3yo so I began teaching how to read non verbal cues regarding consent.
So those two things were very early lessons for my son.
To hold a bottle or to talk?
How to latch on
I’m GenX, my daughter a Millennial and my grandson is GenZ. I was very involved with raising him and I told him many times, you will learn how to take care of yourself. Cooking, laundry, cleaning, pet responsibilities, financial planning, communication, social manners, empathy, compassion, self care, etiquette because no woman was put on this planet to serve you. He had his first dog walking business at 10, he’s a hustler and knows how to make and save money. He turns 19 next month, moved to another State to officially start his LLC with his business partner, engaged to a wonderful woman and had a very bright future ahead of him.
His Mom did an amazing job. She didn’t coddle him or give him passes. He learned to take responsibility for his actions. She limited phone/screen time, he had boundaries and when he broke them, he found out. She didn’t play.
She wasn’t going to raise a child who was entitled. She raised someone who will make a great husband/Dad/Son in Law and overall, an amazing human. And he will be and already is a wonderful human to be around. I am excited for him and his future.
be kind. generally. not specifically just to women, but to everyone. you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar!
How to not be a bigot -from my fiancé and I 😹
Um…to eat solid food?
My son is 17 now. We were big into manners, and at his current age, he’s such a polite, sweet young man ❤️
Hygiene !!
To sleep independently. Mine is 2.5 month old. I have a Velcro baby…
I have one, he’s our first, and he’s only 14 months, but I’m teaching him kindness first. To us, our dogs, people, himself.
Use the toilet and wipe
That he’s a human being who matters.
How to pee sitting down and then when he’s tall enough to aim his stream into the toilet.
How to say “mama”
Emotional regulation, how to clean up, personal hygiene, manners
My almost 8yo likes cooking, meditation, and how to wash his own buttcrack. Anything else in life is bonus lol
Emotional intelligence.
Confidence
Saying: “that’s how I’m wired” isn’t an excuse for not communicating important issues… whether it be with family, friends, romantic relationships, etc.
Nor is it an excuse to justify one’s bad behaviour, which can have a devastating impact.
Please and thank you and love. And knowing that he was safe
I have one the first thing i taught him how to do is hold his head up
I do have a son and he’s currently a toddler. The first thing we really taught him (beyond human basics) ended up being about hitting. We got books and watched videos and had conversations about how your hands are not for hitting.
He took the lesson super well and now we’re teaching him about consent. Mostly because if Dad hugs Mom, our son tries to put Dad in time out. So now we tell him, “No, Mom WANTS a hug from Dad so it’s okay. But if Mom did not want a hug from Dad, then Dad shouldn’t hug Mom and should be okay with that.”
It’s a slower lesson for him to grasp, but he is starting to get it.
I think the first thing I taught him was probably how to say “mama”, or maybe don’t pull the cat’s tail