Hey all, newer to Reddit and don’t know if this is a good sub but if it’s not, please redirect me!
I (30f) have been dating my bf (24m) for about a year and a half now. We started as long distance but I moved in with him back in June. Since I’ve moved in we’ve only had sex twice, once in June and once in July. When we visited eachother long distance before I moved in, about a week at a time, we would have sex fairly regularly throughout those times. I also asked him how often he would prefer to have sex once I moved in and he said once a day. At the time I was surprised cuz it seemed like a lot personally but we didn’t talk about it much further than that.
Some other things of note. He has a below average penis size, maybe about 3-4 in hard. Which I admit is a little disappointing but I’ve never made comments about it to him or act bummed about it. It makes bjs easier for me lol. He told me when his dad was younger that his second testicle didn’t drop and had to get surgery to fix it but they warned him it might affect his kids. My bf is basically sterile, and has almost no sperm or discharge, so I wonder if this affects his testosterone levels. Previously before I moved in I would send him risqué pics and nudes but his responses were disappointing to say the least. He would just say stuff like “lol nice” or “I like it” and the convo would move on. All of this is starting to make me question if he physically likes me at all. He casually grabs my boobs but otherwise he doesn’t seem to get excited to see me naked or anything. He also hasn’t had much prior sexual experience from what he’s told me.
I tried to have a convo with him the other night, asking how he feels about the lack of sex we’ve had. He said he would like to have sex more and will try to initiate more. He said it’s just that he’s usually tired or that he gets horny right before work or before going to sleep. That convo was about two weeks ago. I notice he gets hard while we’re play fighting and tried to start something about a half hour before he went to work but nothing happened. Basically, I want to talk about this more with him and figure this out. I suspect that he has some insecurities either around his size or performance. How do I discuss this productively with him and also help him feel good about himself?