I'm in my 20s but only recently started my sex life with my GF and we are navigating some waters on how to improve it. I know it's not been awful, as I can make her climax, but both of us were thinking about how masturbation affects us and we decided to avoid it — and I did get there without her a couple of times, which I do not like at all; It kind of ruins my own orgasm.
The thing is, I worry that, if I don't masturbate I will not last at all when the time comes. These days I gave myself some stimulus just to check and I felt like I could climax in a minute. What do you think? Is it kind of a necessity for men? Also, do urologists help with this kind of question or do I have to see some other doctor?
5 comments
Ofc, switch masturbating to sex insted.
Definitely not necessary it’s just a hack. Once you have a good frequency going you won’t be over stimulated and gain confidence and control.
Masterbation is actually a very healthy thing.. it allows you to learn what works and doesn’t for you, it can (in moderation) also be beneficial in. Affecting how long you last during intercourse.. it can also be an incredible way to bond and lower inhibitions when done mutually together…..
She should definitely NOT be avoiding it… she needs to explore and learn what works for her own body, both in terms of external stimulation and internal.. plus.. women can come as many times as they like and it has ‘no’ effect on performance… quite the opposite in fact, because most women’s orgasms are supremely linked to how comfortable and relaxed they feel… the less inhibited they feel and more confident they feel then the easier it is to reach orgasm or even have multiple orgasms..
Please take this from somebody who has a lifetime of experience… don’t ever inhibit yours or more importantly your partners desire or right to do what they wish with thier body.. good sex isn’t about holding back, restriction, or abstinence…. It’s about ‘embracing’ who you are, who your partner is, and enjoying every facet and sensation you can with each other AND in your own time..
So, I have to masterbate occasionally. This is due to the lore times I have sex the less time I last. But if I masterbate at least a couple times a week I can usually out last my partners and have to focus to get there. But if I don’t then eventually it’ll make me a 2 pump chump as they say. It makes a world of difference. Now as far as training yourself to cum only a certain way, that’s a mindset I believe. I did ten years in prison and only jacked off. So as you say you train yourself to only cum a certain way doesn’t make sense to me. When I got out and was with a woman it was no different than it was before prison and only jacking off for 10 years. If that was true I’d have only been able to cum by jacking off. I hope this may give you some insight to open your mind up, if not take it as a grain of salt. But I am with @naughtythoughts and a person should never limit themselves or their experiences. I think/feel a person should experience it all. Forget any labels and just be free and try everything you can possibly do and you’re comfortable doing.
Yep. There’s this common advice people give that masturbating helps you go longer. The problem is that masturbating doesn’t actually feel like sex. It’s like practicing you golf swing wlby swinging a baseball bat. Anyway, I can tell you that it’s absolutely possible to gain stamina without jerking off. From personal experience, I’ll tell that my stamina came from…having sex and working on delaying. At one point I had more stamina than my wife could tolerate.