I’ve been seeing a guy for a few months, and sexually he’s mostly submissive. He likes it when I take the lead—making the first move, calling the shots, etc. I’m also submissive, but most of the time he ends up being the submissive one, which I’m fine with, but I’d love for him to take the dominant role sometimes too.
For example, recently I was on top ( like i am 95% of the time ) my legs got tired, and I moved to switch position. He was like “meeeeeh can we wait a little?” And held my shoulders to stop me from switching. I found it a little disheartening because I had hoped he’d take the lead or at least be open to switching things up, and also he was clearly favouring his own pleasure over mine. Ugh…
He’s told me he’s a “switch,” but in practice I rarely see him being dominant.
I’m trying to understand: for someone who’s mostly submissive, how uncomfortable is it to be dominant? Like, what if I told him what to do in another position where he would be more dominant and would be doing the thrusting, does that still feel awkward or unnatural if you are submissive?
He was also a virgin before me, and our relationship is still new, so talking about this stuff still feels sensitive. but I did talk to him and say it was shitty that he didn’t agree to switch when my legs hurt and he understood and apologised, and said he promised to fuck me in another position next time.. but I don’t want him to do it out of pity, if he dosent want to, does that make sense?
So Submissive guys – how does it feel to switch roles? how can I encourage it without pressure?