I’m unsure what to do anymore. There’s no handbook for this sort of thing.
I’ve been married for over 4 years, together for more than 10.
Since 2020 we’ve had a very strained relationship, swore up and down he wants to be married so I believed it.
Every fight we have ends up being a big one.
It’s when Im finally done just nodding and actually standing up for myself.
Every big fight I’m told how all I do is cause problems (no matter how nicely I bring up a grievance.)
Then get told he wants us to end.
Various ways he says it.
When we fight he always goes for the jugular metaphorical of course.
I’ve forgave so often that I’m so angry.
He always sees me in a negative light, never can take a concern or criticism directed towards him. He feels like he is always having to much responsibility, so I’ve taken the higher on the list responsibilities from him and planted it on my pile.
I work, I have a lot of my own priorities.
But I’m beginning to hate him.
I can’t trust what he says to be true anymore.
And obviously I feel unloved, unheard and unwanted.
How does one get past this? Does anyone get past it?
We have tried couples therapy, was only productive if the therapist did not lean into what he was responsible for.
I’m tired of being the strong one.