We have been together almost 10 years. I love her very much. But sex with her has become unsatisfying over the last maybe 2 years. She never flirts with me. No words of needing me, craving me. She knows I like things a little aggressive. I have since day one of being together expressed that. But now she says she doesn't like bdsm. And it is fine that our likes don't align. I know we won't always love the same thing. But now she has zero attempt at turning me on. She will try to go down on me and I mean yeah clitoral stimulation is great but I don't want you to go down on me when I'm not even turned on in the first place. She says she doesn't know how to flirt with me but I'm not an engine that just turns on and off. I want romance. I want to feel wanted. When we first got together it was always hot and heavy. And I know things cool down after kids and careers. We had intercourse a few days ago that left me just laying there. She asked if I felt satisfied, I didn't lie. I said no. That I hadn't evwn been turned on when we had started. It felt fine but also kind of whatever.