For context Im 35 weeks pregnant, so my emotions are all over the place as it is. The anniversary of his father's death just passed.
There's a backhanded joke my husband's been telling me and occasionally our close friends at my expense. That I have dirty feet like a barefooted unpaid field hand. Hes been making this joke for literally years. And its worn me down. To the point that I compulsively check my feet, amd run a damn vac mop robot a minimum of 2 times a day. When he makes this joke it makes me feel bad, like I'm dirty and not taking care of my home. It makes me feel degraded. Well I finally broke last night when he said our toddler, who lives to be outside, had feet like me. I was frank that I didnt like the joke that I never have.
It started when his unmarried military buddy was living with us. I was depressed and the homemaking was still something I wasnt very good at yet, the floors were unsealed acid stained concrete and I prefer to be bare foot so my feet were always dirty looking even if I had swept or mopped. The friend made the joke and husband jumped on never letting up.
He got pretty upset with me, saying I was too sensitive and that I needed to not take him so seriously that I'm the one changing. Well he got so mad that I told him everything I've felt for years, that he left the house and hasn't spoken to me let alone looked at me in two days. Last time we had a fight like this it was 2 weeks before we were okay. Were having a baby in as early as 3 weeks and terrified that I'm going to be alone giving birth and raising our two kids. Hes present for our toddler but we might as well be roommates sharing a bed.
There's no way our marriage is over, over something like this is it? Im not considering divorce but I'm terrified he is. Or at least a loveless marriage.