I [26F] have been with [27M] for about 3 months. We have a great relationship and we’re truly becoming best friends. As time goes on we are getting closer and it’s been great. I really like him, maybe even love him and I love our dynamic.
I guess my only problem is that I do have some relationship trauma and I have an issue trusting. I do trust him, as he’s given me no reason not to and has shown me many reasons why I should, but he is a man who girls just love and he’s someone who has exes texting him. He has this one ex from about a year and a half ago that he dated for about 6 months and she has a kid. I guess the relationship ended because she started asking him about how he would raise her child and he realized he wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment and ended things. When we met she did reach out to him and he politely turned her down and told her that he started seeing someone. I’m happy with how he handled that and again that’s just one reason why I should trust him.
Yesterday we were doing something on his iPad and this same ex reached out again basically asking how his summer is going and trying to spark conversation. This was a lot for me to process as it did trigger something in me but I had no real reason to be upset at anyone or anything. He just deleted the text and didn’t respond but this has been triggering me since yesterday. He constantly tells me how he feels about me and that I’m his best friend and he does spend everyday with me. He even tells me I can go through his texts if I really want to (which I always decline doing because I don’t want us to be that couple). So it’s not that I doubt his feelings for me or I worry he will cheat on me but I have been cheated on in the past and have had guys be sneaky behind my back. I am desperately trying to shake those feelings because he is genuinely a great guy who has shown me nothing but that I can trust him. Any advice?