I know it's awful and I regret it soo much, but I did lie about being STI testet. It was the second time I had sex with this girl: She asked me after an intense sex session wether I've been tested, before offering her first blowjob. That day I killed the mood 2 times for her already and didn't want to kill the mood again and also was super horny, so I lied.
Right now I'm trying to get tested as quickly as possible, but it will probably take 2 weeks, until I have the results.
I don't know how to tell her and I'm worried, that she never wants to see me again, if I do. Honesty and STI tests matter a lot to her. But the risk, that I've actually infected her are moderat, because I only had sex once before, where the only risk was receiving oral and never had any symptoms.
Do you have advice on how to admit the lie, in the least hurtful way? In a way that doesn't traumatizes her or hurts her self esteem? 😟 I also take advise on how to deal with the immense guilt, that comes from abusing her trust 😔