I’m 19F (almost 20). I have a date scheduled next month with a guy I met while cocktail waitressing for poker nights. He is one of those finance bro party types who runs the joint, but the reason why I agreed was because he seemed sweet (is mildly on the spectrum?) and we liked similar music. We also both like working out (a lot).
It’s my first date in over a year and I’m terrified to say the least. The last date I went on was traumatizing and was why I stopped dating for a whole year. Some highlights:
– Ubered us to a train station
– OF girl on his ig main screen
– condom fell out his pocket when he took his phone out and old men on the train stared at me as if I was some disgusting bop
– wouldn’t stop talking about himself and how he was going to be so successful (also didn’t ask a single thing about me)
– didn’t end up getting dinner because the restaurant was “closed” (it took us 2H to get there)
– otw home he asked me if I was a virgin (to which I gladly lied and said no)
– he tried to kiss me at the end of the date after asking me if I thought he was gonna make it (be a successful influencer LMFAOO)
Anyways the reason why I mention this last date is because it made me realize dating isn’t worth my time. I’m applying to physics PhD programs this fall and law schools, I need to concentrate on this obviously. But I figure why not go out on a date with a hot rich guy that I think is cute and see where it goes? Is this a bad idea on my end? (Our plan was to have a little gym date together and then grab dinner afterwards).
My only concern is that he will expect something of me? Like say it does go well, is he gonna try and kiss me? Or try getting me into bed with him??? Cause I’m a marriage only type girl and I feel like maybe he has the wrong idea about me but who knows. he’s also not that much older than me (24 or 25 I believe?)
Is it bad to want to go out just for fun, even if you know it’ll probably lead nowhere? Or is this normal for dating?? Idfk. my problem is I am looking for something serious and because he is hard to read (I wasn’t joking about the mildly on the spectrum part, he’s strange but in a good way) I am unsure of what I’m getting myself into. I’m not into the whole drugs, alcohol, party scene, so there is that…
I also get really bad anxiety when it comes to dudes paying for me don’t ask why but it always feels like you owe them something after a date (which I know is not true but it’s just how I feel and I can’t help that).
Anyways help pls 🙏