Married couples — who plans the vacations, and who just shows up with their passport?
August 23, 2025
In your marriage, who’s the travel agent with spreadsheets and maps, and who’s the happy passenger just asking where to sit on the plane?
33 comments
I guess I do most of the actual booking, but we hash stuff out together.
My husband does all the planning. We’re talking Google docs with daily itineraries. I know I’m always in for a good time with great food.
We plan together, I do most of ticket buying and logistics, he wrangles pre-vacation cleaning, laundry, and packing.
Which is similar to our arrangement for the rest of life.
My husband does the logistics and I plan the activities, but we discuss everything together anyways so it’s pretty mutual.
We make all the plans together, discuss and choose all of our options and itineraries together, and then we use my accounts to book everything because that way our travel points and rewards all go into one pool for easy use.
Neither of us just shows up as a guest. We are both involved in all the planning.
I’m both the planner and the one who just shows up to the airport. I do most of the planning but then I turn my brain off after that. He’s in charge of executing the plan and getting us around. We play to our strengths.
I do all the planning, my husband does all the paying for it.
Engaged but my fiance does all the planning. I just tell him if there’s something I really want to do and he’ll work it in. Then I show up and ask him what we’re doing each day. It’s the best. He also really enjoys and is amazing at planning.
We plan and discuss together, but I’m the one who’s actually making a schedule, booking the travel, etc. my partner (M40) is quiet. Even though I am a passenger princess and always ride shotgun, I also lean across his lap and order at the drivethru. I’ve also had to tell a waitress his order was wrong (very politely I was a server forever) because he was just going to suck it up and eat it. I love my stoic quiet man.
Neither of us plan and therefore we don’t take vacations.
We plan together
I make plane and ship reservations (both ocean and river) after he and I sit down together to figure out where we want to go. Last year we went to Italy and Greece, and he did all the research and reservations for tours.
When we camp here in the US, it’s pretty much the same. We decide together where we want to go, then I do the actual booking.
We plan together, and I do the actual booking. Exept for the time we were given a 3 week holiday as a gift, and we just showed up with passports.
We trade off. We plan the activities together to agree on them. Make a list of the places, activities and restaurants.
Then one of us breaks it down into an itinerary and makes the bookings.
My husband did the bookings for our last trip to Japan. I will do Greece. Then it will be his turn again.
Domestic trips it varies a bit more depending on who is more excited.
We decide together, but I have a bigger need of planning, where hes more spontaneous, so I do plan things more than him because its my need, not his. But otherwise we share, talk and decide together
Depends on the trip sometimes I plan the whole thing, others he planned and others we split like I’ll do hotel he’ll do activities.
We just want to have fun and we both love planning!
I spend hours researching and planning then we decide together and I do the booking. I love the planning almost as much as the vacation.
We stay at home cause we both hate vacations. Okay maybe not the vacations but the people.
Both of us. I’m better at the itinerary, packing, finding activities, etc. My husband is better at the logistics of travel, booking things, navigating.
My husband or I will find something interesting to do or see somewhere and then I do the planning around that. I ask his opinions on restaurants and activities. He’s a very fly by the seat of your pants traveler and I need to have a loose plan.
The one thing he does plan every year is our annual fall drive along the Mississippi River.
If we ever get to go on vacation (haven’t been on one in 12yrs) I’m the planner and organizer.
We plan together and book together.
My wife lays out the broad plan/vision and I handle the physical logistics and paperwork.
And on game day I’m directing traffic. We need to get to gate C10, turn left here, etc.
I do everything always everyday. I plan every meal, every trip all the shopping. We don’t really vacation bc I don’t feel like planning anything. He complains that he needs a vacation. I shrug.
Not married, but in a LTR of 7 years. We plan and book together—one of us usually has a laptop looking at flights/transport and the other has one looking at accommodations. We both have credit cards for the same account so we use that on the actual trip for food/tickets/etc and then tally/split when the trip is over. The cards get us points toward more travel!
When I travel with my husband, we’re both hunched over the laptop, planning. Everything is approved by both of us.
When I travel with my twin brother, though? He literally says “Just tell me where to show up.”
I do most of the planning and he does most of the paying
I’m the planner!
My husband is definitely along for the ride but he is a really nervous traveler. If I didn’t, we would never go farther than town.
I do all the planning, but i involve him in the process. I usually delegate some reservations, and things like insurance, car rentals, things like this.
Group effort. He researches the flights and rental cars if needed. I research hotels and things to do. Kid shows up with her passport.
We plan together as far as where we want to go and what we want to do there, but I’m the logistics person as far as timing/tickets/pricing. I enjoy doing it and have been doing it for myself and friends/family on trips with me since I was 17. My parents wildly let me and some friends go to Europe after graduation and despite still being 17 I had us all sorted out!
When we are actually packing up to leave, we make a checklist and cross off when we’ve packed something. This has greatly lowered my stress and “double checking” habit to see if he’s packed something. If it’s checked, it’s packed! If we are driving, he does most of the driving and I’m the dj.
33 comments
I guess I do most of the actual booking, but we hash stuff out together.
My husband does all the planning. We’re talking Google docs with daily itineraries. I know I’m always in for a good time with great food.
We plan together, I do most of ticket buying and logistics, he wrangles pre-vacation cleaning, laundry, and packing.
Which is similar to our arrangement for the rest of life.
My husband does the logistics and I plan the activities, but we discuss everything together anyways so it’s pretty mutual.
We make all the plans together, discuss and choose all of our options and itineraries together, and then we use my accounts to book everything because that way our travel points and rewards all go into one pool for easy use.
Neither of us just shows up as a guest. We are both involved in all the planning.
I’m both the planner and the one who just shows up to the airport. I do most of the planning but then I turn my brain off after that. He’s in charge of executing the plan and getting us around. We play to our strengths.
I do all the planning, my husband does all the paying for it.
Engaged but my fiance does all the planning. I just tell him if there’s something I really want to do and he’ll work it in. Then I show up and ask him what we’re doing each day. It’s the best. He also really enjoys and is amazing at planning.
We plan and discuss together, but I’m the one who’s actually making a schedule, booking the travel, etc. my partner (M40) is quiet. Even though I am a passenger princess and always ride shotgun, I also lean across his lap and order at the drivethru. I’ve also had to tell a waitress his order was wrong (very politely I was a server forever) because he was just going to suck it up and eat it. I love my stoic quiet man.
Neither of us plan and therefore we don’t take vacations.
We plan together
I make plane and ship reservations (both ocean and river) after he and I sit down together to figure out where we want to go. Last year we went to Italy and Greece, and he did all the research and reservations for tours.
When we camp here in the US, it’s pretty much the same. We decide together where we want to go, then I do the actual booking.
We plan together, and I do the actual booking. Exept for the time we were given a 3 week holiday as a gift, and we just showed up with passports.
We trade off. We plan the activities together to agree on them. Make a list of the places, activities and restaurants.
Then one of us breaks it down into an itinerary and makes the bookings.
My husband did the bookings for our last trip to Japan. I will do Greece. Then it will be his turn again.
Domestic trips it varies a bit more depending on who is more excited.
We decide together, but I have a bigger need of planning, where hes more spontaneous, so I do plan things more than him because its my need, not his. But otherwise we share, talk and decide together
Depends on the trip sometimes I plan the whole thing, others he planned and others we split like I’ll do hotel he’ll do activities.
We just want to have fun and we both love planning!
I spend hours researching and planning then we decide together and I do the booking. I love the planning almost as much as the vacation.
We stay at home cause we both hate vacations. Okay maybe not the vacations but the people.
Both of us. I’m better at the itinerary, packing, finding activities, etc. My husband is better at the logistics of travel, booking things, navigating.
My husband or I will find something interesting to do or see somewhere and then I do the planning around that. I ask his opinions on restaurants and activities. He’s a very fly by the seat of your pants traveler and I need to have a loose plan.
The one thing he does plan every year is our annual fall drive along the Mississippi River.
If we ever get to go on vacation (haven’t been on one in 12yrs) I’m the planner and organizer.
We plan together and book together.
My wife lays out the broad plan/vision and I handle the physical logistics and paperwork.
And on game day I’m directing traffic. We need to get to gate C10, turn left here, etc.
I do everything always everyday. I plan every meal, every trip all the shopping. We don’t really vacation bc I don’t feel like planning anything. He complains that he needs a vacation. I shrug.
Not married, but in a LTR of 7 years. We plan and book together—one of us usually has a laptop looking at flights/transport and the other has one looking at accommodations. We both have credit cards for the same account so we use that on the actual trip for food/tickets/etc and then tally/split when the trip is over. The cards get us points toward more travel!
When I travel with my husband, we’re both hunched over the laptop, planning. Everything is approved by both of us.
When I travel with my twin brother, though? He literally says “Just tell me where to show up.”
I do most of the planning and he does most of the paying
I’m the planner!
My husband is definitely along for the ride but he is a really nervous traveler. If I didn’t, we would never go farther than town.
I do all the planning, but i involve him in the process. I usually delegate some reservations, and things like insurance, car rentals, things like this.
Group effort. He researches the flights and rental cars if needed. I research hotels and things to do. Kid shows up with her passport.
We plan together as far as where we want to go and what we want to do there, but I’m the logistics person as far as timing/tickets/pricing. I enjoy doing it and have been doing it for myself and friends/family on trips with me since I was 17. My parents wildly let me and some friends go to Europe after graduation and despite still being 17 I had us all sorted out!
When we are actually packing up to leave, we make a checklist and cross off when we’ve packed something. This has greatly lowered my stress and “double checking” habit to see if he’s packed something. If it’s checked, it’s packed! If we are driving, he does most of the driving and I’m the dj.
And who shows up without their passport?