My 35f partial family including father and brother 30m do not get along with my Fiancé36m. We have been together 15 years and have a child together. He’s an amazing Dad. Family is very blue collar and my Fiancé is the opposite, like corporate professional. Father and Fiancé have had tension for years. Started when Fiancé went through several close losses in his family and was in a very bad place mentally so I of course vented to my dad but he holds grudges and has disliked him since. Even took his marriage blessing away. Fiancé sought therapy and made changes to his career and we’ve been great since. Fast forward to June this year and the family all went out one night drinking and having fun. Brother comes back to my home which I own with my Fiancé (which he lived in for 3 months after a breakup) and verbally assaulted him. Attacked every aspect of his life. Being a dad, partner and human in general. Called him disrespectful because he doesn’t fake being nice especially to my dad. Fiancé was obviously hurt. A month went by before my brother reached out to apologize to me. He asked to speak to my Fiancé but he left when he heard my brother was coming over because he wasn’t ready to talk yet. Haven’t spoken to him since. Fast forward to now. My little family of 3 booked a vacation together for the first time in a long time. Went to tell my dad about it and he says “oh didn’t want to invite anyone with you all” and I said No, we really just wanted to get away with just the three of us. Then a few weeks goes by and he tells me he booked a place 30 minutes from where we are staying. He has now invited us over for dinner for my sisters (28f) birthday while on vacation. I know what I need to do. Not go. I couldn’t imagine even asking Fiancé if he would want to because the answer is obvious. I’m just so tired of being in the middle of this and the stress it has caused is insane. I’ve even started therapy. I guess my question is, what’s the best way to tell my dad we will be staying to our self on our vacation?
TLDR – Brother and Dad don’t like Fiancé. Invited themselves on our family vacation and dad wants us to come to dinner.