I(26F) date BF(24M) for 6 months. He’s sweet and our relationship has been healthy. He takes me on multiple dates a week, sex is good, makes me laugh, and i feel secure with him. He’s had trust issues and we’ve almost broken up before due to him claiming he doesnt feel i care about him truly, accusing me of cheating and he states he feels less than since he is struggling with money and im in a more prestigious job in his eyes so he feels he cant “do much” for me as a man or provide. (He’s had one prior relationship which was toxic when he was 20 im his first one since so ive been patient with him). Also, some background, i just lost my “prestigious” job a month ago which he’s been more than supportive with him even buying me groceries and making sure im always taken care of. Also hes supported me through family struggles. I have narcissistic parents which led to my first relationship being abusive and after years of therapy, learned i picked up manipulative tendencies from the abuse so i warned my BF at the beginning telling him to call me out anytime he thinks im trying to be manipulative i want accountability.
Fast forward to last night. We eat dinner and play board games. He dozes off. And i go to wake him later because i cant sleep in bed without him cuddling me. He snatches the blanket away and turns over. Now sometimes he talks in sleep but last night his eyes were open and i have never experienced a sleep walker before so i believed he was awake (he wasn’t according to him) if his eyes are open. He refuses, rolls his eyes and tells me to leave him alone i ask why are you being mean he responds “look at you what do you think” i go to the bedroom and lock the door and sleep because im pissed. Wrong of me i know but i didnt want him sleeping near me if he was going to be mean. Next morning we have sex and he tells me before i leave for my FIRST day of a new job he didnt know what happenedlast night, i explain, and he says he understands why i was mad and i was like yea i hate you being mean and he says “well i was sleep you should know i sleepwalk and talk by now” it pissed me off again because im not a sleepwalk expert how would i know if your eyes open you could still be sleep ???
I go to work and texts him if he wants to meet at walmart like we planned yesterday…he ignores me and posts on instagram…
I call him asking why hes ignoring me he says because i was cold after he apologized and didnt hug him or say i love you….well yea we just argued im not really 100% ready to go back to in love happy fantasy land. So i asked are you unhappy with me he said “yes today im unhappy with you. You dont care about me i always say i love you even when im mad”…thats not true but okay is what i respond and he starts saying im being manipulative with him “just like you manipulate your parents and everybody around you”….he’s never even said he felt that way im taken aback. I literally asked to meetup after work as the plans were and hes claiming me asking him, just to confirm our plans again, is me saying i dont wanna go so now he doesnt want to go. It pisses me off because how did me not saying bye i love you and asking if we have plans showing i dont love him or care? How am I manipulative because i was too angry to say bye???
I ask are you just unhappy and taking it out on me because you’re stressed. Hes like you know im stressed that doesnt have anything to do with how manipulative you been…i asked do you want to be with me, he’s silent. I apologized again for locking him out the bedroom but i didnt know he’d blow up like this and now i feel crazy. So i just hung up on him and went back to work. Am i manipulative? Am i not being patient enough? I know i was wrong for locking him out the room and i own that but i truly feel im being blindsided by all his new comments and feelings. we were JUST planning moving in together, HIS idea(something else he’s also expressed financial anxiety over and how he worries about taking care of me). Is this too much drama for a 6 month fresh relationship?
TL;DR locked my boyfriend out bedroom after he was mean in his sleep, i didnt know he was sleeptalking we apologize. Next day he ignores me and calls me manipulative