I’ve been with my girlfriend for about a year and 8 months. The first year was honestly the happiest of my life. Everything clicked, she met my family, work was going well, I felt super lucky to be with her and it was legitimately the best relationship I’ve ever had.
Things unfortunately started to go downhill at the end of 2024. Her dad got very sick so she moved back home to take care of him, and at the same time she was applying to graduate programs which added uncertainty to where she’d even come back to. Neither of us was into the idea of a LDR, but we loved each other so much and we figured she’d be back eventually so we said we’d give it a shot. The first couple months were brutal but eventually I adjusted and began accepting my new life.
Then around 3 months in it felt like everything lined up perfectly. I got a promotion that moved me to a new state, and she got accepted to her program in that same exact state, only 30 minutes away from me. Her dad was recovering, and we finally had a plan to reunite this summer. I was so happy and suddenly felt super fine with the LDR and had a newfound energy to push ahead and live my day to day without her until we were reunited.
Then, literally 1 month before our reunion date, unfortunate circumstances beyond our control meant that she was banned from coming back, lost her university spot, and everything fell apart. It’s now been 8 months since I last saw her and I’ve been spiraling again due to the depression of our plan collapsing and the new uncertainty we face. She’s still optimistic and wants to keep fighting for us, but now she’s looking at applying to programs abroad which means nothing until 2026 and even more uncertainty.
I feel stuck. On one hand the thought of ending things destroys me, I’m her first real love and I can see a future with her, my family and friends all love her, we have similar values, etc. On the other hand I’m young, in a new city, and feel like life is passing me by while I wait around with no clear plan. Some days I feel like I have to let go, other days I feel like we can get through anything together. It feels like an impossible choice, basically choosing if I want to drown or burn.
TLDR: Been long distance for 8 months. We were supposed to reunite this summer but a travel ban stopped her from coming back and now there’s no end in sight. Relationship itself is great, but I don’t know if I should end it or hold on.