Is there a difference (between love and “in love”)? I met my wife and things moved extremely quick between us (moved in together 2 months after we met) and before I knew it we were married.
I don’t think I ever really thought about the long view when we got together, and it has caused a lot of issues. I feel like there was a lot of pressure to get married from my family. I tried to fit into the role… but it’s been nearly 7 years (half that time married) and things have been getting progressively worse between us.
I have tried to be communicative and got us into marriage counseling, but nothing really seems to be helping…
I love my wife and I am grateful for her and all she has done for me in the time we have been together, but I can’t say I’m “in love” with her. There was only one time I have ever truly felt in love with someone. It never worked out, and it led to a lot of pain and loss of my sense of who I was.
I feel like my wife and I essentially went straight to a married life at two months because of how quickly we moved in together. I feel like I tried to change her as well myself to be someone who she isn’t, but I also feel like that was just due to my own stupidity of not taking the long view and making such an impulsive decision because of where we were in the moment. It also led to resentment on her part, rightfully so, because I can’t just accept her for her.
Does any others get this feeling? Is the concept of being “in love” just a fleeting feeling you feel at the beginning? Is it childish and naive to expect it to carry you into old age??