This is the Prenup question, which I'm sure has been asked here ad nauseum.
I am about 9 years older than my partner. At our time of marriage just my retirement should be worth roughly $225k and maybe $55k in HYSA/CD's, zero property. Her net worth at the time of marriage should be roughly $0, from a little cash and retirement +/- a little student loan debt.
I (obviously) don't want to get divorced. I will try my ass off to have a successful marriage, but I also don't want to be stupid. I've seen enough with my parents divorce and others i know who have divorced that the person you marry isn't the person you divorce. With a divorce rate that is roughly 50%, I don't want to be so dumb as to think it will never happen to me.
I feel like not planning something is just planning to let the state divide assets.
I know $225k isn't a ton to a lot of people, but to me it is a lot and VERY hard earned. I'm not a doctor or a super high earner. I'm just an average guy. What I would propose in this theoretical prenup is to protect my retirement sum at the time of marriage AND whatever it's growth is up until the time of the theoretical divorce.
Any assets gained in any way during the marriage and the $55k, I'm not only willing (and legally obligated too), but happy to split.
To be extra clear: Basically anything outside of the $225k PLUS GROWTH, I'm very happy to split 50/50.
Is this a good idea? Is this smart? Is this worth the uncomfortable discussion or argument? Is this possible to create the suggested contract? Would I have to open new retirement accounts after the marriage and never touch anything in the premarital accounts till divorce/retirement (if I do the prenup)? Or just "thoughts" would be appreciated. Especially from women. (if not clear, I'm a heterosexual man)
I'm not trying to be unkind to my future wife. I just want to make sure I share my hard work with my wife…. not an Ex-Wife.