Any time I ask my SO to take care of something, it's always "Im not your maid", "I'm not your assistant" "it's not my job" "you don't respect me if you think I don't work all day" etc.
We have a fairly small place. The actual workload to take care of the place is 10 minutes/day. Maybe 20 minutes if there's laundry. Even then she only does like 30-40% of the housework. Oddly, she'll obsess over weirdly specific chores like bleaching the tub 3x week or mopping a specific part of the floor twice a day. Setting everything aside to wash a single fork.
Is there some way I encourage her to do more and reframe this so she doesn't get offended when I ask for something? Is this potentially a mental illness or something? She seems convinced she's hammered with responsibility.