hi I'm 22f. I just feel like no one is actually serious about dating. They are just either trying to have some sort of validation to feel better or just are bored. And A LOT are not over their exes. And I mean ok? that's fine but please do not try and date another person when YOU KNOW you aren't over your ex. Like I miss some times with my ex but would I actually want to get back with him??? No. we BROKE UP FOR A REASON… and then it's the whole thing with cheating too. I've been cheated on in both my relationships 😭 like idk man people just want to date but have so many unresolved emotions. And you know it's ok to have such feelings but that's only the case if you actually want to grow and not be stuck in such feelings. Like me and my ex had broke up and he immediately texted his ex … did I text my ex??? No I did not BC WHY WOULD I ??? me and my ex were actually together more recent than his and his ex . the whole entire relationship I felt like he wasn't over her and he insisted he was 😐
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And also… why do people just lie? Like damn just be honest lol.. I swear it’s so annoying. For one if you are going to lie at least keep your story straight 💀 like jesus some people are total liars and cheaters and still will beg you to stay with them LIKE JESUS WHAT IS UR DEAL ??? DID U EVER THINK ABT THAT WHEN U WERE LYING OR CHEATING?????
dating be like that in 2025 and your 20’s 🤷🏻♂️
It’s not so much that “dating is so cooked now”, it’s just that what you have described is what dating is like these days.
It is the progression of trends that started about 20 years or so ago.
As a 34M the reason its so bad is because I really don’t think a large portion of the dating pool is focused on connection or knows what that means even. Even people who are married and have kids now the sad fact is that alot of people go through the motions of what they think is the right thing to do versus what feels right. The kids become like a new car to park on the driveway, to show the neighbors that they did everything right – when in reality alot of people are in deep internal turmoil. Im not saying there aren’t happy marriages and well parented kids. But I am saying that our generation prioritized personal accomplishment so much that people rush into things before even knowing their limits or capabilities.
At the end of the day, you sound emotionally aware and ready for something real. Keep your peace and protect your energy. The right person won’t make you question if they’re over their ex.
Depending on the area your in, for a man 60% of the profiles you see are either spam bots women look for drugs, or onlyfans “models”
Why should anyone take this seriously? It’s honestly kinda funny.
I don’t know it is “worse”. There have always been memes even before the word existed about people with baggage, people cheating, people playing the field.
The area I’m seeing the biggest change is the reliance on apps to get a date. In the old days, you’d go out with a friend group or meet at work and you will have met the person before you make a decision about dating. You’d also get instant feedback from friends, and chances are because of the location, event and activity or workplace you were socialising at, the person you were interested in already had been “filtered” and were much more likely to a match for you. The apps don’t really filter by socieo-economic status, interests or activities or hobbies or community. That lack of filtering means there are extra challenges to deal with.
As hinted at by u/Esamers99 individual rights and “my right to be an arsehole” seem to be one and the same thing these days. Too often people mistake a right to individual autonomy as a right to be an arsehole. Basic politeness and social decency are lacking these days.