I 32M and girlfriend 31F . Found my girlfriend on fetlife messaging a guy who’s on her way home from work. In the chat she asks if he’s single, he says he’s married but wife is aware, she then says “I’m in a relationship, he is unaware, is that a problem?” She claims it was “pretend” cheating. We got a kid together and a house and all that, would have been 8 years this October 10th. We got this house 3 years ago (August 2022), got pregnant in Feb 2023, daughter born 11/11/23. She came home with hickies covered on her in July 2024, I told her stop whatever she’s doing we got a kid it’s time to grow up. August 2024 find out she was cheating on me from July 2023-Sept 2023 (all while pregnant). That caused a huge problem, we went to counseling for 3 months, she kept saying the counselor wasn’t helping, she never wanted to go back said we were “fixed”. August 8th I find those messages on her phone. Why was I going through her phone? She went through mine the night before and forgot to close the night before. Well I went through hers before I went to work and that’s what I found. Then her profile being active since June 2020, so lots of weird things. I think I’m just with someone who’s an addict, but man is she weaponizing our daughter. Cause I’m leaving this time.
Am I over reacting? What are your thoughts on these messages?
TL:DR-
I 32M and 31F Gf, caught her cheating for 3rd time. Finally leaving. Am I overreacting?