So I, 18, have a close friend the same age. In person we get along can talk for hours and so and so, and hangout well, as the same goes for calls. Whenever we talk its always nice, we enjoy.
Thing is, I always take lead here in most decisions as well.
On top of that, my friend rarely texts. He’s not on the phone much, which is decent and I understand.
But whenever I message to make plans he barely responds like until a day or two later and then it’s a dry response, not even directly answering the original question. It pisses me off when all he says back is “couldn’t respond yesterday” and completely ignores the point of my message, like, seriously? he says he is bad at making plans, which I start to doubt a lot.
He’s not outgoing at all and he is submissive too. It’s not that I think he doesn’t value me as a good friend.
the lack of genuine responses is irritating me because we haven’t met in months. I am not even pushy and try to match the same energy, yet it gets me nowhere.
Every single time, he is never sure about making plans, whether or not he has absolutely nothing to do. leaving the convo empty for weeks unless I engage first. Whenever this previously happened I asked in person as to why, he would just say he might hve some “plan” coming up and would 90% of the time not be sure within a few days. Is it really that hard?
I never had these problems with any of my other friends in general.
So I’ve thought of stop wasting my energy and to expect nothing unless he reaches out first.
I want at least something reciprocated. I was thinking about just silencing this relation for the while. Not sure if he is genuine or not at this point. I’d like to hear some thoughts, thanks.
TLDR; My (18M) close friend cannot respond to plans properly. I literally cannot plan things out because he is always unsure no matter what.
He is very submissive and also says he’s bad at making plans, but is it really this bad?
In person we always talk great otherwise for hours and enjoy, but I don’t understand his rationale when it comes to legit ignoring my prompts. should I not plan anything since I can’t keep up with the lack of genuine response?