Someone asked me (43 M) what I’m looking for in a partner. And I’ve been thinking about it, and trying to put it in words.
I like adventure – hiking, road trips, chasing waterfalls, trips to the coast – so I’d want someone who enjoyed those things also.
I also like going to concerts and movies as well, and dive bars and listening to karaoke and going to bingo, trivia, and open mic comedy.
Ideally she would be active and exercises. It’d be awesome to work out together or do the treadmill or elliptical together.
She can have her own hobbies and interests – these are just some of mine that I hope we can share and I hope that she can share some of hers with me.
I lost myself in my last relationship and I wouldn’t want either of us to lose ourselves. Maintaining our own identities is important. Remember, it’s Ken and it’s Barbie.
If she has kids, I’d hope that she’d let me be included and share in their lives as I’d want her to do the same with my kids. I wouldn’t see it as her kids, or my kids, but rather as our kids.
Preferably she would know how to cook, as I’m not that good of a cook, and instead I’d do the dishes. I’m also a fairly clean and organized dperson, I do all of the cleaning now, and most if it before when I was married.
I want someone to match my energy, with a yes attitude more so than not. Wake up and drive to the coast? Let’s go.
I don’t want to be talked down to, belittled, disrespected, or taken advantage of, because I would never do that to her.
Ideally we’d be each other’s best friends, helping and encouraging eachother to be the best versions of ourselves as we can.
Hopefully she would also have a comperable sex drive as me so that we can enjoy eachother fully.
Ultimately though, I want someone to add value and peace to my life, as I would hope to add value and peace to hers.
My advice is to figure out what you want as well.