We started dating very quickly and then had to do long-distance. I live in Turkey and he’s in Canada. Fortunately, we see each other every month or two.
After I finished my studies, I stayed in Canada with him for four months. During that time, our relationship was a rollercoaster. When I returned to Turkey, he became distant, cold, and gave me silent treatments. After fights, he would be disrespectful and say awful things that put me down. It felt like emotional abuse.
He broke up with me, then came back, then wanted “a break.” I loved him so much that I just went along with whatever he wanted (and yes, I know I should have left). He barely spoke to me, and when he did, he called me things like “loser” or “piece of shit.” I was deeply hurt.
One night after a particularly hurtful fight (when I didn’t know if we were on a break or fully broken up), I was in so much pain that I got drunk and slept with a guy visiting Istanbul from Spain I guess to fill the void. I regret it deeply.
A short time later, he started messaging me again. That was about six months ago.
Fast forward to now, we’ve worked through so much. Our relationship is healthy, he treats me like a princess, apologizes for the way he treated me, and is even going to therapy. I truly feel loved and respected now.
But the guilt of what I did is eating me alive. My sister says I should take it to the grave because telling him would destroy everything we’ve built.
Should I tell him or not?
TL;DR: He treated me badly and we were on a break/possibly broken up. During that time, I got drunk and slept with someone. Now he’s changed, we’re happy, and he’s in therapy but the guilt is killing me. Should I tell him or stay quiet?