Tl:dr – I am self sabotaging my relationship because of my attachment style and my ptsd from past unhealthy relationships and I don’t know how to stop.
We have been dating over a little over a year and living together for 7 months. We’ve been going through a very rocky patch for the last 6 ish months and I think it’s all my fault. We were close to breaking up this weekend because he expressed that although he still loves and cares for me it’s been very rocky and he’s worried that it’s not going to get better. I acknowledged my part in this being due to my anxious attachment and he acknowledged that his communication skills aren’t the best which further triggers me sometimes. I feel like it’s mostly my fault though, because I tend to get triggered or pick a fight when he forgets to tell me he made it somewhere safely, or doesn’t text me for an extended period, forgets to say goodnight (if he’s out of town or I am). Etc. small things that shouldn’t cause the emotional reaction that they do in me… in the grand scheme of things he’s a good boyfriend and he shows up for me when I really need him. He accepts me completely and is very supportive. So why do i take this small things as a sign he hates me or doesn’t love me. I feel like I’ve already ruined everything and pushed him to a point where he thinks we won’t work. I asked him if we could keep trying and he said he doesn’t wanna give up on us but things need to change and we both have work to do. I just don’t know how to stop this:( any tips please ?