This is going to be a long one… So I guess i’ll start this off by explaining that my boyfriend is Mexican and I am Black. He has expressed to me how he wants to share his culture with me which i LOVE and told him I also want to share mine. His favorite spanish singer is touring and he told me he really really wants me to go with him.
So concert tickets went on sale a couple days ago, i checked my schedule and told him I work that day but would try my best to get it covered so I can go with him because I know he really wants to go. He ended up buying two tickets anyway.
I emailed my supervisors to see if i could switch days and they told me no bc that’s the one day they’re short that week. I won’t have the PTO to cover if i call out and if i do anyway, i have to have a whole meeting with my supervisor about my performance and they will give me a strike (if you get 2, you can potentially be fired).
I posted in my works group chat asking if anyone could switch with me and so far no one has answered. So i told my bf that i’m not sure if im going to be able to go and that im sorry but there’s still a lot of time and I will try to figure it out.
He says he is going to be upset with me if I cant go… I tell him that I understand that but if it’s one of his favorite singers he should still go! He made a post about it on his story and apparently his friends have been telling him he’s so lucky he got tickets etc etc so I suggested he can ask one of them. He said he doesn’t talk to them like that so he doesn’t want to. I asked if he asked his siblings and they can’t go either. I suggested selling a ticket and going alone because he shouldn’t let me having work stop him from seeing his favorite artist. He said no because he’ll look weird going alone. I told him over and over again it’s not weird and i’ve gone to concert alone and it’s still so much fun! Said we have gone to concerts together and talked to people that were alone and asked if he thought they were weird and he says no but it’s different for other people. So again, he refused. Says he will only be able to go if I go with him and that he’ll be really upset with me if he can’t go.
He says he knows it’s out of my control but that he wanted to share this with me and it’s his favorite artist. I understand that but i told him to begin with that i might not be able to go and now he’s putting pressure on me and making me feel bad.
He also has an old car and it can’t go long distances so he wants to take my car. My car has been having problems lately with the AC and last time we took a long drive in mine he was freaking out bc it was hot in the car and he couldn’t handle it. So i told him that’s what it would be like if we took my car.. and also i told him I didn’t really want to take my car anyway because driving it so much with the problems it has isn’t good for it and I don’t think it’s worth messing up my car even more than it is, even though it’s in better shape then his.
He spent a lot of money on the tickets and like i said i feel like he’s putting it on me now if he can’t go. Like i’m the one ruining it for him. He hasn’t directly said that but that’s what it feels like.
Advice on how to navigate this? Because i’m at a loss and don’t know what to do. The concert is in a month so there’s still time for someone to hopefully switch shifts with me but i’m not sure it’s going to happen…
TLDR: My boyfriend (of 5ish months) is mad he can’t go to his favorite artists concert with me and refuses to go alone even though I told him before he bought the tickets that there was a chance I couldn’t go.