Most men I meet aren’t broken. They’re just overexposed to fake expectations and underexposed to clarity.
They played the game. Did everything right. Got hit anyway.
Now they walk around with rage they can’t name, and loneliness they’re not allowed to admit.
The worst part? They still think it’s their fault.
I started writing things for men like that. Just private breakdowns. Not advice. Not therapy.
Something else.
No goal here. Just saying it out loud.
18 comments
Nothing could be truer for a man than the saying, “no one is coming to save you.”
Thank you.
This is bot slop.
I’m in this post and I don’t like it
Yeah I feel this.
Poetry (it is, whether you like it or not aha).
Gay dude here. I almost feel like I’m in an easier position vs. straight bros these days. I got the chance to process all this hard shit while I was in my teens/twenties (sure as fuck didn’t feel like an advantage at the time!)
Hard being a straight dude these days. My advice: you guys should talk to each other about it more. Save each other. Fuck knows, that’s how we made it through (most of us anyway). Good luck man – keep your stick on the ice!
Yep, dating for the average man is an absolute nightmare.
You’re a man, they shouldn’t have to save you. If you feel someone needs to come save you, you’re not living in reality.
It’s like as a man, half the time you’re in the dark about EVERYTHING. And no one wants to turn on at least a nightlight for you
There is also a real deal male loneliness epidemic. Dads have other dads, men have co-workers (and sometimes, if they’re lucky) work friends/real friends, but I know a lot of dudes who just don’t have people to talk to/hang out with outside of these spaces.
It’s why I think activities like golf, BJJ, gym culture, etc. are becoming more popular. I work out with a group of 6-8 guys at a local crossfit style gym before their first morning class. We’re there 5 days a week, many of us work together/at the same hospital, and the relationships there transcend work heirarchy. Same with my jiu jitsu gym and crew. I hang out with and get to meet people there that I never would have otherwise. Cops, teachers, chefs, ex-cons, current cons (I think), etc.
As someone with lifelong severe mental health issues, this means something different to me (alongside loneliness or dating or whatever this was supposed to allude to) but rings true anyways.
I don’t know. “No one’s coming to save you” is a phrase that really messes with me, because when people usually say it it’s supposed to be a message of empowerment, but if you read it as “nobody’s coming to save you and you won’t save yourself” – which I do – then it feels like a pronouncement of doom. If nobody else will do it and you can’t or won’t do it, well…shit sucks, buddy. Sorry. People fall through the cracks, it is what it is.
The title is literally a philosophy.
“In life, you become the person that could have saved you when no one didn’t.”
At your lowest point, when you NEED that help, but have to dig yourself out of it. You become the person you needed to help you instinctively. So you never experience it again and, God forbid you find someone in the same direction straights, you can help them too.
Cool story, bro.
10 years and a lifetime of building the perfect life to lose it all. I just count the ways till I don’t wake up. Spend all my time at the gym playing sports, dancing and pretending I’m still happy but am dead inside. Have plenty of women who are interested but I feel nothing towards any of them. Can’t even finish sex anymore. I just please them and have them spend the night so I can feel a little warmth before the darkness of the next day comes. Some days I drive for hours just hoping for someone to hit me. Every aggressive driver I drive close to hoping they push their anger onto me is the most likely cause for me end at my age as I don’t have the courage to end things myself. Pills don’t fix any of it. Therapy doesn’t fix it. Only I can yet I can’t figure out how to be happy after having everything and losing it. Hopefully I do one day.
It’s a ramble. Sorry 😞
As I sit here, I am listening to Depeche Mode’s *Enjoy the Silence* and it takes me right back to my senior year in high school.
Yes, I was the good boy. I played the games I was told would make me happy. I fell in love with a girl. Took her to the senior prom. And she didn’t feel the same towards me.
That song perfectly reflects what I felt at that time. I was ripped open to my core and bared in my loneliness.
Yep, it was one instance where I thought that if I played the game correctly, I could get the girl and be loved. Others came and went in my life, but she was the first.
Sorry to ramble. I am wallowing in the memories of the emotions of that time.
Brother, most men have definitely not done everything right.
I understand the sentiment here, especially in today’s climate, but no need to be ridiculous.
Out of the men who don’t make it, the overwhelming majority of those men did more wrong than right.
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation… and go to their graves with a song left to sing.
I don’t have a whole lot of anger about what’s happened to me *as an adult*, I accept that bad shit sometimes happens. What makes me angry is what happened as a child, and the number of adults that considered beatings discipline, or the fact that no one asked questions as to why I and a lot of my other cousins all avoided that one older relative. There were a lot of opportunities for adults to step in and do the right thing, and maybe one in 18 years actually *tried*.
I learned ‘no one is coming to save you *early*. I didn’t grasp ‘someone should have tried’ until my 30’s