The only way I can explain this phenomenon is in the terms of a video game RPG vs a DND game. I go through life completely unaware of choices that are better than the ones I make and it leaves me thinking “wait, that’s an option?! I would have never thought of that and I hate that I wouldn’t”
As for the example: in a video game rpg you have limited dialogue choices, select one and go. Whereas in DND you can literally make anything up and the DM and dice decide if it works/how it works, not how life works I know, but it’s the idea of what I’m talking about.
It seems everyone around me operates in a way that they aren’t constrained by predetermined responses/actions and it just leaves me feeling like I’m kind of like an npc that can’t think of what to do/say except for the things I’ve practiced.
Eg I can’t think of responses to people I’m talking to, when I try to say something other than my practiced responses I get tongue tied or my mind goes blank.