Women who slowly lost interest in someone you once deeply liked — what exactly changed for you?
July 26, 2025
Women who slowly lost interest in someone you once deeply liked — what exactly changed for you?
13 comments
I got bored
[removed]
My first love. I was heartbroken when we broke up. It was due to him moving countries.
We kept in touch over the years, and for probably a decade, I’d always feel a little pang in my heart when I’d see him with his new girlfriends, new life, etc. Wondering what could have been…
As we both got older, I eventually married, had children, and got on with life, and he’s still a bachelor. His life no longer looks as cool as what it did when we were both in our 20s because he never really evolved. He always talked of traveling more, but he never did. He’s still going to the same places, with the same people, and working the same job.
That’s not to say that’s a bad thing or he’s not happy, but it made me realize that we were never meant to be together, and my fond memories of him was of the 24-year old version of him… not the 42 year old him.
My knowledge and understanding of who they were as a person
I realized I was projecting a fantasy onto him and that I didn’t want to be with someone who didn’t appreciate me either
He did.
In the past, my standards were not firm, and I was involved with many men who did not meet them. I gave everyone a chance because I was flattered at what seemed to be genuine interest in me. However, as time went on, and they began to show their true selves, I noticed a pattern my nervous system and spirit would not allow me to ignore. The lack of emotional depth, as i came to understand what actually made me compatible with someone, and this trait is the very thing that made me choose whether to continue investing time into someone or not. I simply required a level of substance unavailable in meh who don’t read books, who live sheltered lives, who never travel, etc. I am not in alignment with someone whose world I find a bit TOO small. So I let them go, they enjoyed what I represented, but did not add value. Even if I am able to like someone a lot, I am looking for soul food, and that is what makes me love someone.
The realization they are not who you thought they were…
He was extremely insecure and only cared about himself. I saw it back then at 20, but I was blinded by his stupid tats and guitar skills. He wanted nothing to do with me to “focus on his music”. Now when I run into him in public, he’s still single, insecure and miserable hiding behind his tattoos and guitar. Nothing has changed, 15 years later. Dodged a bullet
13 comments
I got bored
[removed]
My first love. I was heartbroken when we broke up. It was due to him moving countries.
We kept in touch over the years, and for probably a decade, I’d always feel a little pang in my heart when I’d see him with his new girlfriends, new life, etc. Wondering what could have been…
As we both got older, I eventually married, had children, and got on with life, and he’s still a bachelor. His life no longer looks as cool as what it did when we were both in our 20s because he never really evolved. He always talked of traveling more, but he never did. He’s still going to the same places, with the same people, and working the same job.
That’s not to say that’s a bad thing or he’s not happy, but it made me realize that we were never meant to be together, and my fond memories of him was of the 24-year old version of him… not the 42 year old him.
My knowledge and understanding of who they were as a person
I realized I was projecting a fantasy onto him and that I didn’t want to be with someone who didn’t appreciate me either
He did.
In the past, my standards were not firm, and I was involved with many men who did not meet them. I gave everyone a chance because I was flattered at what seemed to be genuine interest in me. However, as time went on, and they began to show their true selves, I noticed a pattern my nervous system and spirit would not allow me to ignore. The lack of emotional depth, as i came to understand what actually made me compatible with someone, and this trait is the very thing that made me choose whether to continue investing time into someone or not. I simply required a level of substance unavailable in meh who don’t read books, who live sheltered lives, who never travel, etc. I am not in alignment with someone whose world I find a bit TOO small. So I let them go, they enjoyed what I represented, but did not add value. Even if I am able to like someone a lot, I am looking for soul food, and that is what makes me love someone.
The realization they are not who you thought they were…
He was extremely insecure and only cared about himself. I saw it back then at 20, but I was blinded by his stupid tats and guitar skills. He wanted nothing to do with me to “focus on his music”. Now when I run into him in public, he’s still single, insecure and miserable hiding behind his tattoos and guitar. Nothing has changed, 15 years later. Dodged a bullet
He blocked me on IG
Lack of effort, communication and reassurance
Saw him at his worst
lack of effort🥱