Hi! I’m 15f (nearly 16). I’ve struggled with extreme social anxiety for most of my life until about a year ago. Since then, I’ve been working on myself, and while I’ve improved in managing conversations without stuttering or breaking into tears, I’ve realized I lack social skills. Severely. Here are my main concerns:
– Should I maintain eye contact throughout the whole conversation? Is it okay to take breaks? What if someone across the room is staring at me? Should I ignore them or take it as a sign they want to communicate with me?
– How do I approach people, especially those I’ve never talked to before yet see everyday? I’ve tried initiating conversations but often get minimal or no response.
– Can I treat boys and girls with the same level of intimacy? What’s appropriate in terms of physical contact and interaction?
– What topics can I discuss besides ‘how are you’s’ when I’ve got nothing going on in my life? When is it appropriate to discuss personal stuff? How do I figure out if someone is safe to talk to about private matters?
– How does body language affect conversation, and does it indicate anything? And if so, to what degree? Is it ok for me to put any significance on the body language of another person?
– Some people mistake me for a boy due to my appearance and interests. Some people have expressed their distaste for how I present myself. Should I consider changing my style to a more stereotypically feminine one to improve the quality of my (non-existent) social life?
Even though I’ve made a lot of progress with my social anxiety, I’m still friendless. :” People often say I come off as weird, yet when I ask for feedback, I get nothing in response. Any advice would be kindly appreciated, even tips about stuff that wasn’t mentioned in this post. Thank you for reading! There’s more I’m wondering about, but this covers the main stuff.