A thought I started having when I compared how my men vs women friends discuss their dates.
If I ask a guy friend how their date went, they’re likely to say either she wasn’t attractive/bad personality, or “she was cute/hot, we had a good time, I want to see her again!”
Talking to a girl friend on the other hand, there is waaay more variety and depth in how they analyze their dates, and they are very likely to say, “he was cute and nice, had a good time, but there was no chemistry/wasn’t attracted.”
To me it seems like for guys, as long as the girl looks good and they have good conversation, that’s good enough. They will like her and want to see her again. For girls it seems to hinge so much more on this mysterious “chemistry” that only appears with few people.
I also notice this reading guys’ accounts of dates on this sub. There are so many posts that are like, “I thought the date went well! We laughed, talked, had things in common, I thought she was cute, I look just like the pics she matched with so she must think I’m cute too, I don’t understand why she doesn’t want to see me again!” Men often genuinely seem confused by this.
But I feel like this is not confusing at all to most women. We all understand what it’s like to have a pleasant evening with someone, enjoy their company, find them handsome, think they would make a lovely friend, but just have no interest in dating them because this “chemistry” isn’t there.
And honestly, as a woman this annoys me. I wish I could be like a guy and just happy with anyone who looks good and whose company I enjoy. I don’t understand why so few people have that element of chemistry that I need in order to feel romantic. Makes dating hard as fuck.
Anyway, what do you guys think? Do you think women place more emphasis on chemistry than men? Or maybe men just experience chemistry with a broader range of people than women?