I (F22) recently had a little argument with my partner (M25) of 2.5 years about directions. Albeit, I did give him a some attitude when he told me our car was parked in a place whilst I thought it was parked in a different direction. Eventually I said “okay” but in a sassy tone, and I can see that it upset him/made him feel disrespected. I was honestly just really confused because I truly thought I was right but I followed his directions regardless.
He ended up telling me we “spent like a minute talking about it” insinuating that the whole thing was stupid and I said something along the lines of “it’s just 60 seconds”, and it upset me that discussing something for a second made him that upset however I can see that he was frustrated because of my attitude probably and not the conversation. Fast forward as we’re walking he said “you’re talking back to me” when he exclaimed why I was upset and I think this added more fuel to the fire because it instantly made me triggered and I felt like he was talking down to me. When I told him how it makes me feel to say i’m talking back to him, he said it’s normal and should be considered normal to say somebody is talking back to you in moments like this. I told him it makes the other person feel like you’re talking down to them and he just doesn’t see it this way. He said he should not have to fix the way he speaks just to exclaim that he didn’t like the attitude but I told him he could have just said he did not like my tone or the way I said something but ultimately he thinks they’re synonymous.
How would you feel if somebody told you you’re “talking back” to them? Am I overthinking it? Or are there better ways to say things?
TLDR: Would you be upset if somebody told you you’re “talking back?”